Rep Matt Gaetz and Rudy Giuliani Announce New Business Venture: #GaetzCream

Sunday July 18, 2021: FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE

Indoctrinate Your Kids With MAGA and QAnon With An Ice Cream Cone

Rudy Giuliani and Matt Gaetz Form Gaetz Cream

Following his banning from Fox News, Attorney to the MAGA Stars Rudy Giuliani joins forces with Rep. Matt Gaetz to form #GaetzCream. Taking the neighborhood ice cream truck to the next level, #GaetzCream sports its own special brand of ice cream called “17 Flavors.” Sure to be a hit with the MAGA folks, this new ice cream delivery service promises lots of smiles on a hot summer day.

The MAGA Agenda, Rudy Giuliani, Rep. Matt Gaetz and Ice Cream

Rudy Giuliani, no longer able to spread The Big Lie on Fox News, stated: “#GaetzCream is the epitome of the MAGA agenda. We are teaching kids and high schoolers that you can enjoy ice cream on a hot summer day, spread the Delta variant as well as The Big Lie.”

Rudy also added: “We expect this to do particularly well in areas that watch Fox News. We did a test run in front of The White House, but that didn’t seem to go over so well. Therefore, we intend to focus our efforts on the areas of the country that enjoy sedition.”

Rudy Giuliani Driving More Than The Big Lie

Matt Gaetz asked right away, “It’s important that I personally hand out the ice cream to the kids, so someone has to drive the truck.” Rudy, being a MAGA team player jumped right in. “Firstly, I love to drive big things, like The Big Lie, so why not drive a big ice cream truck” Rudy noted.

“I did find that driving made me nervous so on my first day I began sweating profusely behind the wheel. This kid ran up to me with a MAGA hat and said, “Hey Mister, is that chocolate dripping down your face? Finally, I knew the kids would be entertained.”

17 Flavors:

In addition, Rudy Giuliani noted that the 17 Flavors will be unique to the ice cream venture. Formulated with ice cream loving seditionists in mind, #GaetzCream will be sure to bring a smile to the face of The Big Lie and QAnon believers alike. 17 flavors is just what a hot summer day, due to Global Warming, calls for.

1. Covid Colada
2. Sedition Strawberry
3. Teen Spirit
4. Gang Greene Delight
5. Trump Orange
6. Not So Vanilla
7. Sex Trafficking Sinnamon
8. Vaccine Vanilla
9. Fauci Ouchi
10. Rudy Rose
11. Pence Punch
12. Adderall Apple
13. DeathSantis Dark Fudge
14. MAGA Madness Strawberry
15. Apprentice Apricot
16. Jim Jones Kool Aid
17. QAnon Crunch

Also, see: Ron DeSantis and Laurn Boebert on the High Seas